by Suzie Doscher
The reason "Just think positive" drives me crazy is that in order to really "think positive," a positive mind-set is necessary. Even naturally positive thinkers can have moments of drifting off into negative thoughts. But their strength is to return to a more positive approach rather than get trapped in the negative place of doom and gloom.
To 'just think positive' it is indeed necessary to have a positive mind-set.
When you are struggling to stay positive about something, you are probably feeling stressed. This might be the result of feeling uncertain or lacking clarity about the situation, person or project, or any number of other reasons. So when I hear that the advice given by a helpful, supportive friend or colleague is to just think positive, I usually will ask: “And exactly how do you suggest your friend or colleague does this while feeling stressed?”
By Adam Fridman
"Purpose Inspires, Values Guide, Habits Define."
Purpose is the why of your organization. Purpose is what gives work meaning. But purpose is in danger of becoming "GWOP" - Goals Without Plans - unless it is aligned with your culture. Putting it another way, purpose is about where your company's journey is taking you. Culture is the combination of values and habits that will get you there.
Purpose, Values or Culture: What's the Difference?
Some people confuse the ideas of purpose, values and culture. They are three similar but distinct concepts. If purpose, values and culture were a math equation, they'd look something like this:
By Jessica Hicks, Assistant Editor at Thrive Global
If you had a dollar for every time you hear “new year, new you,” leading up to 2020, you’d probably be a millionaire by the time the clock strikes midnight. We all like to talk about starting fresh when January 1 rolls around, yet we often set ourselves up for disappointment by making resolutions that are products of wishful thinking, instead of focusing on realistic and achievable goals. The key to making goals that last is starting small, with Microsteps — and there are so many minor changes you can make in your daily life that will have a major impact down the line.
These eight science-backed strategies — implementing the very latest research — are simple enough to incorporate into your daily or weekly routines, and are sure to change the way you work and live in 2020.
By Susan Kelly
Struggling to finish that report for your boss? One way to increase your interest in a task is to add immediate rewards, rather than wait until the end to reward yourself, according to new Cornell research.
“It’s About Time: Earlier Rewards Increase Intrinsic Motivation” published in the June issue in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
By Jeff Haden
Happiness: Everyone wants it, yet relatively few seem to get enough of it, especially those in their early 40s. (I'm no psychologist, but that's probably about when many of us start thinking, "Wait--is this all there is?")
Good news and bad news: Unfortunately, approximately 50 percent of your happiness, your "happiness set-point," is determined by personality traits that are largely hereditary. Half of how happy you feel is basically outside your control.
by Travis Bradberry
The ability to manage your emotions and remain calm under pressure has a direct link to your performance. At TalentSmart, we have conducted research with more than a million people and found that 90 percent of top performers are skilled at managing their emotions in times of stress in order to remain calm and in control.
There is some startling research that explores the havoc stress can wreak on one’s physical and mental health (such as this Yale study, which found that prolonged stress causes degeneration in the area of the brain responsible for self-control). The tricky thing about stress (and the anxiety that comes with it) is that it’s an absolutely necessary emotion. Our brains are wired such that it’s difficult to take action until we feel at least some level of this emotional state. In fact, performance peaks under the heightened activation that comes with moderate levels of stress. As long as the stress isn’t prolonged, it’s harmless.
‘Balance – the Practical Handbook for Life’s Difficult Moments’ helps you gain clarity, offers guidance and support for difficult moments. This self-help book provides tools and skills which help you to take action.
Practicing the steps in the exercises is vital as repetition is important to shift your behavior. Practice allows your mind to slowly be “reprogrammed” much like getting the “virus” out of your software.
Reach for ‘Balance – the Practical Handbook' AT ANY TIME OF DAY for guidance and encouragement to address the stressful moments in which you wish you had someone to talk to.
Identify life skills, routines and new habits through the clear, uncluttered guidance presented without gimmicks or convoluted language.
There really is no reason not to become the best version of yourself.
“Life is full of difficulties and disappointments, scrapes and stumbles. But a wise friend who is willing to help us ask the right questions can make the journey so much easier. Doscher's BALANCE isn't a person but it surely feels like one -- a caring empathic companion who guides the reader to discover answers for themselves. The book is clearly laid out: it is meditative and calm but absolutely practical, encouraging us to ask the questions that will make sure we are happier, more assured, kinder to ourselves. It's neither fluffy nor jargon-ridden: I can't imagine the reader who wouldn't feel gratified by reading it, hearing Doscher's warm quiet voice, and putting the gently persistent suggestions into action”. (Amazon review)
“Balance is a basic book, filled with common sense, pragmatic advice. This may not sound very exciting, but it may be just what you most need when dealing with stress and your attempts to achieve balance in your life. It includes plenty of questions to answer and consider, and actually participating enables the reader to discover answers for themselves. Written with grace, humor, and practicality, Balance can help you remember that while balance may not be easy, it doesn't have to be overly complicated”. (Goodreads review)
"A truly inspiring book I have read this book at a point in my life where I wanted something to change and I didn't know if it ever could. Through these pages I have understood how our experience in life depends 90% on us and not on external events, and that is a life changing lesson indeed. Absolutely recommended." (Audible review)
For a sample exercise from the Balance Handbook (page 96) read: "Act Not React - Change Your Reactive Behavior"
How about a Self-Help Book in Yours and/or a friends Christmas Stocking?
By Chris Colin and Rob Baedeker
Imagine almost any situation where two or more people are gathered—a wedding reception, a job interview, two off-duty cops hanging out in a Jacuzzi.
What do these situations have in common? Almost all of them involve people trying to talk with each other. But in these very moments where a conversation would enhance an encounter, we often fall short. We can’t think of a thing to say.
Or worse, we do a passable job at talking. We stagger through our romantic, professional and social worlds with the goal merely of not crashing, never considering that we might soar. We go home sweaty and puffy, and eat birthday cake in the shower.
By Rebecca Muller, Assistant Editor at Thrive Global
Carving out time for regular recovery is essential for your mental well-being and performance — but sometimes, planning a traditional vacation can feel overwhelming, or is simply unrealistic with a tight timeline. For instance, if you’re a new parent, an anxious traveler, or a caregiver for a loved one, you might not be able to book a last-minute flight to a far-off destination to unplug and recharge — and that reality alone can be stressful.
“The kinds of vacations we take are highly constrained by the demands of family, school and work calendars, and finances,” Alex Soojung-Kim Pang, Ph.D., author of Rest and The Distraction Addiction, tells Thrive. “One size doesn’t fit all.” Pang notes that a getaway is often most valuable because it helps you tap into a mindset that allows you to relax — but you don’t have to go away to hone in on that vacation-focused mindset. In fact, even people who do go on traditional getaways can miss the point. “Too many people go on vacation and stay connected the whole time,” adds Arthur Markman, Ph.D., a psychology professor at the University of Texas at Austin and author of Bring Your Brain to Work. “They don’t give themselves a chance to recharge.”
By Jessica Hicks, Editorial Fellow at Thrive Global
Knowing how to delegate is essential to successful leadership, but it’s a skill that can be challenging. Some managers don’t like to hand over responsibility, while others might be nervous about appearing disengaged — but what these leaders don’t realize is that delegating can provide growth opportunities for their colleagues, and reduce stress for the entire team.
Plus, managers need additional support. A recent Gallup report found that managing various types of employees and stakeholders can escalate stress for managers, who “need protected time to think, do their own work, and respond to requests.”
If you’re a manager who’s unsure how to hand over a task, check out these tips to make the process more thoughtful and effective:
Self-Help Book / Personal Development