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The Coaching Group Of Switzerland

(Excerpt from  "Balance - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments" by Suzie Doscher  to be published Spring 2014)

First of all consider:
What would make the biggest difference right now?

• Could it be managing my time better so I am not always rushing or running late?
• Learning how to express myself more clearly to be  better understood? 
• Fed up with feeling uncomfortable in social situations or within my team at work?
• Would having a better attitude help?
• Maybe it is discovering what really would make me feel good about my life?
• etc.

Before embarking on this path, please remember to set aside a period of time, as often as possible to be alone to clear your thoughts and relax. A refreshed mind is essential to inner peace and clarity. There is no balance when there is stress. This contradicts calmness, serenity and happiness.  To be able to take care of others the best place to start is by learning how to take care of yourself.
 
The only way to reach the top of a ladder is to take it step by step. The same is true of Personal Development. With every step the view will change. You will experience life differently. There is no way of knowing exactly what it will be like until you have done this. Life and all it encompasses change all the time, sometimes daily. Being patient and equally important flexibility is vital to your success.
 
Were you designing a plan for your Personal Development, the following points would be central for you to consider:

• It is never too late to grow and develop as a person.
• Think of 'where' you are now and  imagine how you would like your life to be.
• What are your personal values? Identifying these is a stepping-stone to understanding how to establish an achievable plan for personal development. Focusing on areas which do not matter will make it  impossible to be motivated to achieve your goals. Concentrate rather on aspects of your life that align with your core personal values. 
• Be Realistic in your expectations.
• Accept that some choices might be the wrong ones. That is alright. You are likely to make a better one next time. “Failures” are opportunities to learn. They tell you more about your weaknesses and strengths. Measure progress against where you were before.
• Learn how to pay attention to what your inner voice is telling you. This is an essential skill in improving yourself as a person.
• If you feel you are continually unable to reach your goals, reassess them. Find out if they are realistic and truly what you want. Perhaps there is an obstacle in the way, which first needs to be cleared. You might find you are making simple mistakes such as not spending enough time on your path or not getting the right information.
• Determine what is, or has been, stopping you so far. Imagine how you wish life to be once you are a little further up the ladder of personal development. What has to be different? Where can you make compromises?
• Know that taking these steps towards improving the quality of your life is a sign of courage and strength, not weakness.

This path might offer challenges along the way, however the changes it brings to the quality of your day to day life, at home and at work, will be invaluable. 

By Susan Begeman Steiner

You will want to read The Gifts of Imperfection if you are: 

• Tired of living your life from "should" and are ready to live from your heart  

• Interested in research-based information that includes the word "wholehearted"

• Done with  trying to live up to the expectations of others 

• Ready  to follow that age-old advice: "Just be yourself"

The Gifts of Imperfection by Dr. Brené Brown is a guide to wholehearted living. The book is surprisingly un-sentimental, action-oriented and just plain true. The kind of true that will have you shaking your head yes while you are reading. From  her research and her personal journey into wholeheartedness, Brown lifts up the very real possibility of actually living as yourself with no apologies. 

“Worthiness doesn't have prerequisites.”   
― Brené Brown

A story from Dr. Nido Quebein (quoted in Chicken Soup for the Soul by Jack Canfield)
Submitted by Heinz Müller

Some of the greatest success stories of history have followed a word of encouragement or an act of confidence by a loved one or a trusting friend. Had it not been for a confident wife, Sophia, we might not have listed among great names of literature the name of Nathaniel Hawthorne. When Nathaniel, a heartbroken man, went home to tell his wife that he was a failure and had  been fired from his job in a customhouse, she surprised him with an exclamation of joy.

"Now“ she said triumphantly, "you can write your book!“

"Yes“, replied the man, with sagging confidence, "and what shall we live on while  I am writing it?“

To his amazement, she opened a drawer and pulled out a substantial amount of money.

“Where on earth did you get that?“ he exclaimed. "I have always known that you were a man of genius,“ she told him. "I knew that someday you would write a masterpiece.  So every week, out of the money you gave me for housekeeping, I saved a little bit. So here  is enough to last us for one whole year.“

From her trust and confidence came one of the greatest novels of American literature: The Scarlet Letter.                                                                                   

                                                                                                                         

by Suzie Doscher 

“Challenges in life either do or do not have solutions.
If there is a solution somewhere, then there is no need to be overwhelmed by the challenge.
If there genuinely is no solution, then there is no point being overwhelmed by it.”

If you genuinely believe there is a solution to every problem there is a greater likelihood that you will find the solution. Personally I believe “Where there is a will, there is a way”. I do not always find the way as soon as I had hoped for, sometimes this is due to lack motivation. I then remind myself that I know nothing stays the same therefore have nothing to fear. Things will change even if I do nothing. Obviously, I might not get the outcome I had hoped for but then again if I chose not to get myself motivated then that was my choice! When I find myself lacking motivation I either find someone to talk to or brainstorm with me, or I take any time pressure off myself and see what comes up on its own.

Sometimes it is not the right time to deal with an issue, solve a work related problem, make a change or whatever the challenge is you might be facing. This does not mean you have given up on finding the solution, to me this means I am not in the right frame of mind, a strong enough emotional place or have enough time, to focus on resolving whatever requires attention.

Really believing that you can find a solution to every problem gives you an advantage. This advantage is strength and personal power. You are more likely to overcome nearly all, if not all, the problems you are faced with. Sometimes the best solution is to walk away from something. 

If an issue overwhelms me, I break it down into smaller issues I can cope with. (This usually comes after I have cried!) 

I remember having to read through a rather large contract one day. The only way I could cope with it was to give myself permission to only HAVE TO read 5 pages in the morning and 5 in the afternoon. So, my solution was to break the reading down into smaller steps.

So if you are fully convinced that a solution exists for every problem, then problems no longer feel like problems, instead they become tasks to deal with. Your thinking makes a world of difference in what you achieve.