• Home
  • Coaching
    • Executive Coaching
    • Team Coaching
    • Communication Coaching
  • Programs
  • Coaches
  • Testimonials
  • Self-help Books
  • Blog
  • Contact / FAQ's
The Coaching Group of Switzerland
  • Home
  • Coaching
    • Executive Coaching
    • Team Coaching
    • Communication Coaching
  • Programs
  • Coaches
  • Testimonials
  • Self-help Books
  • Blog
  • Contact / FAQ's

Coaching Blog
The Coaching Group Of Switzerland

Finding Your Purpose in 3 Ways: The Only Questions You Should Ask / Thrive Global

31/5/2018

0 Comments

 
by Cayla Vidmar posted on Thrive Global

I lay in bed in the middle of the night, looking at the ceiling when my chest seized up in excruciating pain. This chest pain was something that had been going on for some time, but this was next level. At that moment I realized something was wrong: I hated my job, the one I had worked so hard to get.

My job itself wasn’t overly stressful, but I couldn’t shake the thought that my life still wasn’t what I thought it should be, and it was quickly ticking by, with every year being the same as the last.
The work I was doing wasn’t changing people’s lives, I wasn’t helping anyone, I didn’t feel like there was any meaning in my day to day life.
​
On top of that, I couldn’t figure out what my purpose was, or what I’d rather be doing. I was running in circles, consuming as much information as I could about starting businesses and flip-flopping from one passion to the next.
My list of possible dream careers swirled in my head, I imagined a thousand different realities before breakfast. But I couldn’t figure out my one thing and was quickly losing hope.

Important Things Vs. Unimportant Things As Mark Mason so aptly puts it: “We exist on this earth for some undetermined period of time. During that time we do things. Some of these things are important. Some of them are unimportant. And those important things give our lives meaning and happiness.”

It really is that simple.

The problem is we easily get swept up in all the possible realities and careers presented to us that we quickly lose focus. We’re easily distracted.

Top that with commitment phobia and we end up stuck in the spin cycle of “Well, I think I would like to do that, but what if I commit all this time, energy and resources on it and end up hating it?”

Then 50 years go by and we arrive to our late life with that “What the hell?!” look on our face wondering how we made it this far without doing/being the things/person we wanted.

Our Purpose-Finding Approach is All Wrong

“The opposite of love is indifference, and the opposite of happiness is boredom.”
 
— Tim Ferriss


There are literally thousands of paths and careers out there. Probably millions. There are people who taste test ice cream, are professional mermaids, and Instagram for a living. What a time to be alive!

And it’s true, the possibilities really are endless. But the problem is that we’re just throwing spaghetti against the wall and seeing what sticks. When it comes to picking a passion, most people are chasing goals rather than chasing how they want to feel.

So we manifest and achieve all our goals — like the pay raise, the new job, starting that business — only to find out that we’re still not happy or fulfilled.

The goals we achieve end up not being important to us, and so we bounce to the next goal and so on until we die. We might get lucky and find something that truly does bring us fulfillment and joy, but it’s kind of a risky gamble, isn’t it?

If our lives aren’t guaranteed and tomorrow might never come, I’d rather try to hedge my bets on a sure thing rather than just hoping my choices will bring me fulfillment. Which is why I got really clear with myself. I asked myself the following three questions and it forced me to get to the nugget of truth, the real thing I was actually chasing. Not just the goals, not just the ideas, but the actual thing that leads to fulfillment, meaning and purpose.

How I want to feel every day
Because if every day feels like loathing, it’s going to add up to a lifetime of loathing. If every day is the rest of our life, I’d rather my days feel purposeful and enriching. You too?

Good, here are 3 questions you need to ask yourself before you do anything related to job hunting, business-starting or passion-finding:
  1. How do I want to feel every day? Don’t you dare just write ‘happy’ or ‘fulfilled’ and think it’s going to cut it. Get creative, dig deep into what you want each day to feel like. For instance: I want my days to feel like freedom to create, I want to feel energized by helping people get back into alignment with themselves, I want my days to feel decadent.
  2. How can I feel those things every day? This is where the rubber meets the road. What things can you do every day to make you feel the things in question #1? For instance: I want to have a creative career so that my job or obligations are centered around creation and big ideas. The decadence I want to experience could be in lingering over good meals with friends and family, having a morning coffee or tea ritual or creating dedicated time to meditate.
  3. What can I be that lets me feel like this every day? Take the list of things you can do every day and start drawing a road map for a career or business. How can you make money by feeling like this every day?

Not everything is going to fit. Unless I want to be a Instagram foodie (which I don’t), I probably can’t make money from lingering over a good meal with friends. That one is just for me to create in my life regardless of what career I have. The point is to connect the dots between all the things you can do and then draft out an ideal career or business to start.

Conclusion
“We thought that we had the answers, it was the questions we had wrong.” — Bono
​

The point here is plugging deeply into our desires and how we want to feel which manifests itself differently from person to person. It’s a losing game looking outside of yourself to figure out what you should be doing with your life.

No one knows but you.
​

And while you might be convinced that you have no idea what you want to be when you grow up, the truth is that the answer has been there all along. You just weren’t asking the right questions to find it.

To explore your purpose -  Book a Life Coaching Session

0 Comments

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    Blog Home

    ​Self-Help Book / Personal Development
    by Suzie Doscher
    3
    rd Edition

    Picture
    Buy your book at Amazon
    BALANCE - offers you support  in life's difficult moments. 
    This book is about change and finding balance in life. Full of self-coaching exercises to help you learn and grow.

    Available in Paperback and Kindle at Amazon stores worldwide
    Audiobook narrated by Suzie Doscher on Amazon, Audible or iTunes

    RSS Feed

    Categories

    All
    Balance
    Business Coach In Lausanne
    Business Coach Zurich
    Coaching
    Coaching In Lausanne
    Coaching In Zurich
    Coaching Switzerland
    Coaching Switzerlandd
    Communication
    Core Values
    Covid 19
    Covid- 19
    Davide Costella
    Effectiveness
    Emotional Intelligence
    Empowerment
    Executive Coach
    Executive Coaching In Zurich
    Happiness
    Joy
    Leadership
    Life Coaching
    Life Coach Zurich
    Mindfulness
    Motivation
    Networking
    Neuroscience
    New Years Resolutions 2019
    Organizational Culture
    Other
    Pandemic
    Personal Development
    Seb Jauslin
    Start Ups
    Staying Focused
    Susan Begeman Steiner
    Suzie Doscher
    Team Coaching
    Virtual Coaching

    Archives

    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    November 2013
    October 2013

Contact info:


Suzie Doscher
Executive Coach for Self Development
​ 
​
Email Suzie
​Phone: + 41 43 443 59 54
www.suziedoscher.com
Linktree
Susan Begeman Steiner
Executive Coach
Team Coaching / Team Facilitation

​Email Susan
​Phone: + 41 78 798 83 99
www.sbsteinercoaching.com
Davide Costella
Communication Coaching
​NLP Coach

Email Davide
​Phone: +41 76 358 37 28
www.davidecostella.com
Seb Jauslin
Executive Coach for Daring Leaders and Lawyers 

​Email Seb
Phone: +41 76 202 01 13
​www.sebjauslin.com
Linktree

  • Home
  • Coaching
    • Executive Coaching
    • Team Coaching
    • Communication Coaching
  • Programs
  • Coaches
  • Testimonials
  • Self-help Books
  • Blog
  • Contact / FAQ's