Mindfulness Is To Be In The Moment - In The 'Now'

by Suzie Doscher 
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There are wonderful books, classes, films, talks, workshops, DVDs, magazine articles, conversations, coaches, and therapists teaching the importance of being in the moment, staying in the now and going with the flow. But how do you really do this?

It seems odd that we do not just naturally live in the now. After all, almost everyone would agree that the present moment, the now, is all we have. The fact remains that most people do not live in the present moment and have to learn how to do so.
 
Reasons to master living in the moment:

• You receive instant relief from stress
• You are able to manage fears better
• You become calmer. A sense of calmness enters if you stop to take a few breaths. Focusing on your breathing returns your mind to the present moment, away from your thoughts.
• You feel stronger and some of your personal power returns. You feel stronger because you took charge of the moment. This offers the feeling of having influence and consequently strength.

 
Steps to practice being in the moment:

1. Realize and accept that you are free to choose in each and every moment. You can choose not only what you do, but also what you think. This awareness is the first – and often the hardest – step to integrate into daily life. It is, however, an important truth.
2. Raise your awareness to where your thoughts are taking you. Perhaps you find yourself lost in a thought relating to a future or past event while you are actually taking a wonderful walk.
3. When you catch yourself no longer being “there,” remind yourself that you are free to choose in that moment what you think or do.
4. Make up your mind where you want to be.
5. Do you want to be enjoying your walk and taking in what you see, breathing the fresh air or do you want to be lost in something that is truly not relevant to the time and place you are in at that moment?
6. Find a way – a little trick or an image – that will support you in breaking your thoughts at that moment. Some people imagine putting their thoughts into a cloud that is passing by, or into a boat that they then push away from shore. Really negative thoughts can be placed into a building that you then blow up! Another way is to pinch yourself or turn in a circle a few times. Find something that suits your personality.
7. Take a few breaths and focus on exactly where you are and what is going on.
   
   

By practicing these steps, you can slowly teach yourself how to stay in the moment, or at least how to bring yourself back from where your mind has taken you. This applies to all actions and thoughts. You may be at work, getting on with your job and all is fine, however, you find yourself lost in the pain of something that happened that morning with your partner. Ask yourself how that pain is relevant to the present moment at work. Focusing on what is actually happening right around you in that moment. Tell yourself it is all right to resolve the issue around the pain at its appropriate time, e.g., when you see your partner or get a chance to call.
 
Our minds tend to take us to places and times that are not real. What might be real in that moment is a beautiful tree right in front of you. The boss that was rude to you earlier in the day is no longer standing there or even in the same room  anymore! 

The gain of living more in the present is that life becomes more relaxed and enjoyable. It becomes a powerful technique enabling you to step out of stress.

Be patient because this takes a lot of practice and time. Eventually you will appreciate the power that you give yourself with this ability to be mindful.
 
What is there to gain?
I have been working with one of my clients, who I will call Elaine, on how to live in the now. Her tendency has been to react, motivated by past emotions. Our focus was to bring her to a place of acting, rather than reacting. Here is what Elaine felt she achieved from learning to put herself back into the now.

1.  I am able to solve problems more easily, because I only have to deal with the one actually on the table in front of me. I know that future problems (projections) will be solved at that moment, at that time. With this separation, I am able to worry less about the future, knowing that problems will be solved when they occur.
2. With this way of looking at things and problem solving, I feel a sense of freedom and can enjoy the day more – even if it is a difficult one. The load is not so heavy because I am only carrying the load of the present day.
3. Feeling freer gives me strength, which makes me ready for everything that happens in the moment.
4.  I have more time. It seems that not wasting time by worrying about what might be, or feeling the emotions of what was, I create space. Space equals more time to me.
5. I enjoy my own company more. This makes me happier.
6.  It has been hard and takes practice, but it is well worth it to feel the way I do now.

 
By mastering the art of living in the moment, you are taking good care and being very kind to yourself. That alone should make it worth the effort.
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Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche was quoted as saying: “Do not encumber your mind with useless thoughts. What good does it do to brood on the past or anticipate the future? Remain in the simplicity of the present moment.”  Wise words to remember, don’t you think?

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An excerpt from Suzie Doscher's book: 'BALANCE - It is Yours If You Want It' - revised and updated 2nd Edition to be published later in 2018

Contact one of our coaches to explore how you can improve the quality of your life by being more present in the moment.