A brief overview of the basics of Personal Development as I experience the process based on my coaching practice.
1. The Present
Eckhart Tolle refers to living in the now, which means being able to see and feel what your life is in the present moment.
The present-day buzzword for this is to be mindful by practicing mindfulness.
Standing in a beautiful park, by a calming body of water, or attending your child’s school play or other family event, and actually seeing the trees, feeling the flow and energy of the water, enjoying the play or event while feeling joy instead of being lost in your thoughts (which are taking you elsewhere) is experiencing the now, the present moment, being mindful of that very moment.
Thoughts can propel you into an entirely different location even if you are not there physically. It seems odd that we do not just naturally live in the now. After all, almost everyone would agree that the present moment, the now, is all we have.
When you are able to live in the day life becomes more relaxed and enjoyable. You empower yourself by influencing what you can influence.
Change is not easy, nor simple. If you have been told you should change, but are not really convinced that this is true, you are more likely to fail at completing the process. Personally, I recognize the process to be complete when I no longer remember ‘what I was like before.’ Someone still in denial about the need to change will not get very far.
Chances are there will always be excuses in the form of: I do not have the time for this right now, I am busy, I already know how to…, it is not my fault, you do not understand, ‘a leopard cannot change its spots,’ I am too old, etc.
Change can only really happen if you are ready to take action.
by Suzie Doscher
The reason "Just think positive" drives me crazy is that in order to really "think positive," a positive mind-set is necessary. Even naturally positive thinkers can have moments of drifting off into negative thoughts. But their strength is to return to a more positive approach rather than get trapped in the negative place of doom and gloom.
To 'just think positive' it is indeed necessary to have a positive mind-set.
When you are struggling to stay positive about something, you are probably feeling stressed. This might be the result of feeling uncertain or lacking clarity about the situation, person or project, or any number of other reasons. So when I hear that the advice given by a helpful, supportive friend or colleague is to just think positive, I usually will ask: “And exactly how do you suggest your friend or colleague does this while feeling stressed?”
By Suzie Doscher, Executive Coach and Life Coaching focusing on Personal Development,
You have a goal, but are worried you will not achieve it. So many issues are popping up that need dealing with, obstacles and other unexpected ‘stuff’ keeps interfering with your daily plan and / or overall daily structure. Stress kicks in, which means focusing is harder and so less is achieved … sound familiar?
All of these thoughts and mind chatter do not have to result in you getting off track or losing sight of your goal. The trick is to take charge of your thinking and push the ‘reset’ button. By this I mean, ‘reset’ the moment, not the direction you are heading or the goal you intend to achieve.
Resetting the moment means handling whatever is causing you stress. Stress is an emotional issue and will not vanish with the flick of a switch in your brain. Unless, of course, you already....
by Katie Santamaria
What’s your most cherished value? We all have driving forces that keep us inspired and motivated, whether it’s supporting our loved ones, giving to those in need, finding fulfillment in our work, or making a difference in our community.
Determining your most cherished value and using it to your advantage can drastically change your approach to your work, infusing you with additional internal motivation, says Rebecca Greenbaum, Ph.D., professor of human resource management at Rutgers University’s School of Management and Labor Relations.
That’s where value triggers come in. Value triggers are items that represent something that matters deeply to you — for example, ...
by Suzie Doscher, Executive Coach and Life Coach focusing on Personal Development, Self-Help Author
Coaching your team?
Add this skill to your coaching style – being non-judgmental.
There is an abundance of articles on being a coach to your people. I enjoy reading the quality information provided by the Harvard Business Review.
The desire to increase, enhance or maintain the quality of work, and in some cases even the quality of life at work, is evident.
The article in the HBR: Most Managers Don’t Know How to Coach. But They Can Learn, offers wonderful insights on what coaching is all about and aims to achieve.
Your responsibilities include leading, motivating, inspiring and with your coaching you hope to further their growth, development and enhance their skills.
by Suzie Doscher, Executive Coach, Life Coaching and Self-help Author
Knowing you have the skills to bounce back, not only on an intellectual level but also feeling this on an emotional level is true strength. Resilience, in my opinion, is knowing that no matter what comes your way - you can handle it. You know you have the strength and confidence to get up, dust yourself off and move forward. Your self-esteem is strengthened by this ability. You have the confidence to figure out and fix, or change, whatever has set you back.
This might sound easy so it is important to remember that when emotions are present (have been triggered) I can handle this is not necessarily the first thought or feeling that might occur.
Neuroscience has proven when emotions are present, the brain’s cognitive resources are the first to be disrupted. In other words, emotions overpower thinking in that moment.
When a situation results with you feeling stressed, kicked down, frustrated, angry, unsupported, alone, confused, overwhelmed etc. - these feelings are the emotions triggered by whatever happened.
By Suzie Doscher
Learning how to respond to a situation rather than just reacting to it brings huge rewards. Needless to say, it is one of those behaviour changes that is easier said than done. However it can be achieved.
Responding rather than reacting means you will have taken time to consider the situation and which response and consequent outcome best suits you.
The difference between reacting and responding:
By Marcel Schwantes
Are you a negative person? If you're at the point where you're seriously looking to shift to the positive, step one is to change your attitude and alter your perception about your current situation.
Since that may border on cliché, allow me to suggest a practical plan of action focused on three mental hacks that work. This will take some commitment and intent, but it's what the most positive people have mastered.
BALANCE - It is Yours If You Want It
by Suzie Doscher
The BALANCE Handbook helps you with difficult moments.
This book is about change and finding balance in life.
Read it when you feel vulnerable and unsure of yourself.
This book will help you find new opportunities, learn new behaviors and life skills to become the best version of yourself.
Handle everyday problems more effectively and improve the quality of your life and the life of those around you.
Take the time to invest in yourself before you find yourself off balance. Strengthen your weaknesses before they rule your life.
This 2nd Edition Handbook now includes the Interactive Workbook for Self-Coaching. With the journaling in the Workbook you explore your goals, where you stand now and the issues from the past holding you back.
Buy your bookook today and start bringing more balance into your life.
Available in Paperback, Kindle, Audiobook at Amazon stores
or Audiobook alone Audible or iTunes
Contact Suzie Doscher
Self-Help Book / Personal Development